How to Overcome Being Shy
6 Tips on Overcoming Shyness
For many people their shyness can be crippling. They cannot face social situations on their own, and in fact, can’t even go into restaurants alone. Some even find leaving the house and going shopping difficult. They feel that they are being watched with every step they take, or worse, judged by other people with every move they make.
This type of debilitating shyness needs to be treated as soon as possible. Otherwise, it can only get worse and lead to many problems later in life. No one wants to be stuck being shy. It is a terribly painful condition to have – both mentally and emotionally.
If you are one of these people who feel shy and awkward in new and strange situations, then you will be pleased to know that help is out there. The following tips should help you to overcome even the worst shyness.
1. Try to use positive affirmations in your life to help you to overcome your troubles. First thing every morning when you wake up and for the rest of the day whenever you remember, think of a positive phrase to repeat to yourself. It can be any phrase you like, for example, ‘I will be more confident today!’ Say it loud, say it proud. Better look yourself in the eye while you say it, so find yourself a mirror and, at least once, try to say it loudly.
2. Take some time to work on your appearance. Make sure you look great every day. You have enough to worry about if you are shy without worrying about your clothes as well. Never go out with dirty finger nails or scuffed up shoes. Others will notice that you look great and they will want to know you even more.
3. Do something challenging every day. Try to push yourself beyond your boundaries in small ways. Try to do something which you would ordinarily be terrified doing. Go out and sit in a café, completely on your own. Start up a conversation with a stranger at a bus stop. Maybe keep a diary of exactly how you feel before and after you perform your feat of brilliance. You will probably be surprised at how often you write in something like ‘…”and it made me feel great!’ or words to that effect. You will begin to feel proud of your achievements.
4. Shy people can sometimes appear standoffish or rude to others. If you don’t answer a direct question because you are just too shy to speak or make eye contact, the other person might just think that you can’t be bothered. It might be an idea once in a while to smile and apologize for your shyness. You don’t have to make a big deal of it, but just let the other person know that it is something that you cannot help. This will only work in certain situations. Practice it to yourself first and only do it if you can say it convincingly and without tripping over your words.
5. Don’t let rejection push you further into your shell. Everyone gets rejected every now and then. Think about all those famous authors who were rejected time after time. There would be no Harry Potter books if the thirteenth publisher had not accepted them! That’s right; the books were rejected by twelve publishing houses. If you need to be sad for a while then so be it. You can’t help your emotional reactions to rejection, but after that pull yourself back up and carry on!
6. Start up a new hobby or activity in which you can learn a new skill. It is very surprising how many shy people are extremely talented and go on to become famous actors and singers. Once lost in their talent, they also lose all their inhibitions and worries about what everyone thinks of them. You don’t have to start a showbiz career just to get over your shyness. Learn a new instrument, or take up a sport. Anything which will give you the confidence to hold your head up high and look people in the eyes.
As Tennyson said: “The shell must break before the bird can fly.”
I wish you great success!
Scott Barker- EzineArticles- Expert Author
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Filed under: Self Esteem/Confidence, Self Help, Self-Improvement
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